‘Twas the Night Before Christmas

Autism Night Before Christmas

by Cindy Waeltermann

Twas the Night Before Christmas
And all through the house
The creatures were stirring
Yes, even the mouse

We tried melatonin
And gave a hot bath
But the holiday jitters
They always distract

The children were finally
All nestled in bed
When nightmares of terror
Ran through my OWN head

Did I get the right gift
The right color
And style
Would there be a tantrum
Or even, maybe, a smile?

Our relatives come
But they don’t understand
The pleasure he gets
Just from flapping his hands.

“He needs discipline,” they say
“Just a well-needed smack,
You must learn to parent…”
And on goes the attack

We smile and nod
Because we know deep inside
The argument is moot
Let them all take a side

We know what it’s like
To live with the spectrum
The struggles and triumphs
Achievements, regressions…

But what they don’t know
And what they don’t see
Is the joy that we feel
Over simplicity

He said “hello”
He ate something green!
He told his first lie!
He did not cause a scene!

He peed on the potty
Who cares if he’s ten,
He stopped saying the same thing
Again and again!

Others don’t realize
Just how we can cope
How we bravely hang on
At the end of our rope

But what they don’t see
Is the joy we can’t hide
When our children with autism
Make the tiniest stride

We may look at others
Without the problems we face
With jealousy, hatred
Or even distaste,

But what they don’t know
Nor sometimes do we
Is that children with autism
Bring simplicity.

We don’t get excited
Over expensive things
We jump for joy
With the progress work brings

Children with autism
Try hard every day
That they make us proud
More than words can say.

They work even harder
Than you or I
To achieve something small
To reach a star in the sky

So to those who don’t get it
Or can’t get a clue
Take a walk in my shoes
And I’ll assure you

That even 10 minutes
Into the walk
You’ll look at me
With respect, even shock.

You will realize
What it is I go through
And the next time you judge
I can assure you

That you won’t say a thing
You’ll be quiet and learn,
Like the years that I did
When the tables were turned……

Watch the McPhail Family Extreme Home Makeover

The McPhail family from Medford, Oregon have two young boys with autism. As a family known for their generosity and community service, the McPhails are paid back with a home that is designed with their boys needs in mind. There is even a guest appearance by Temple Grandin as she helps to explain the needs of people with autism and gives advice on the design of the home.

Watch It Now!!

Monday Musings – Keeping the Fun in Halloween by Lori Lite from Stress Free Kids

Keeping the Fun in Halloween

By Lori Lite, Founder of Stress Free Kids

Trick-or-Treating can be challenging for children with special needs and dietary restrictions. Planning ahead and looking at Halloween with an eye towards your child’s needs can keep your child’s Halloween experience stress free.

1. If your child has dietary restrictions, no problem. Let them collect the candy and sell it to you afterwards. Items with peanuts get 5 cents each. A whole bar is 25 cents. Assign different values for different types. Kids love this exercise and will spend hours sorting the candy into their value group. Take your child to their favorite store and let them spend their candy money on a treat! You can also carry 2 bags. One for the candy that seems OK upon first inspection and one bag that parent carries for “no go” candy.

2. Consider your child’s needs. If they do not do well in a noisy group, schedule a special friend to trick-or-treat with and stay away from the crowds.

3. Decide and let children know ahead of time how many pieces of candy they are allowed to eat while trick-or-treating and after. Let your child keep the wrapper to keep count. When they ask for more…ask them to count how many wrappers they have and let them answer their own question.

4. Head home before your child becomes tired! Do not wait for the meltdown. Think of similar experience and calculate how long you think your child will last. Let your child know ahead of time how long you are going out for. Bring a timer if your child responds well to timers. Take breaks and check in with how your child is doing.

5. Be flexible! Do not make your definitions of a fun Halloween define your child’s expectation of fun. It is not necessary for children to dress up or even trick-or-treat to have a good time. If you child wants to answer the door and hand out candy, then let them do that without feeling guilty. If your child wants to sit on the porch and costume watch, then let them. If they just want to go to bed…… Trust me it will not matter when they go to college!

6. Costumes could be an entire essay. Most kids do not want to put a jacket over their costume. Direct your child to a weather appropriate costume and consider long johns under the costume. Comfort is a huge issue for young children and children with sensory sensitivities. Be sure to try the costume on ahead of time to check for itchy spots. Bring comfortable shoes or sweater if your child refuses to leave the glass Cinderella slippers at home. Colored sweat pants and sweatshirt with hood make an easy costume. Bright yellow with a pair of sunglasses and you have a sun. Sew strips of fabric, yarn, or ears on a hood and you have a lion or a rainbow… Be creative!

7. Eat a healthy dinner before leaving the house.

8. Go early with young children…before it gets dark and have fun!

Happy Halloween from Stress Free Kids and Apples to Oranges Dietary Coaching!

Stress Free Kids founder Lori Lite has created a line of books and CDs designed to help children, teens, and adults decrease stress, anxiety, and anger. Ms. Lite’s books, CDs, and lesson plans are considered a resource for parents, psychologists, therapists, child life specialists, teachers, and yoga instructors. Lori is a certified children’s meditation facilitator and Sears’ Manage My Life parenting expert. For more information visit Stress Free Kids and for daily advice follow Lori on Twitter and Facebook.

Don’t forget to enter the Apples to Oranges Halloween Giveaway! You could win a basket full of candy that is free of artificial dyes and artificial flavours. Click here for the details!

Monday Musings – Top 10 Back to School Tips With a Twist

Rather than do the usual list of tips for heading back to school that everyone else is writing I thought I’d do something different this year.
These are the last few days to get in some quality family time before everyone gets back to their regular scheduled routines. And in the case of a child with special needs we all know that means back to therapy appointments, social skills groups and so on.
So my biggest back to school tip is to try and be in the moment these last few days and share some special times as a family before the fall routines begin.
With that in mind here is a list of ideas on how to get in a couple more summer memories before school starts.

1. Have a backyard marshmallow roast complete with a sing along of your favourite tunes.

2. Cook a meal together. Based on your child’s abilities, assign them a task of washing some produce, chopping some veggies, mixing a sauce or tossing a salad.

3. Make a photo album. Upload your pictures to your computer, decide on a few to print and put them together in a “Summer 2011″ memories album.

4. Head for water! Find a quiet pond, lake or beach. Depending on your child’s preferences you could go swimming, play at the water’s edge or collect rocks.

5. Lay in a field. Find some green space, lay on your back and listen to the world go by. This is a great time to chat with your child about upcoming school routines or just lay quietly and listen to the bugs.

6. Kick a ball around. Head to a park or out to the back yard after dinner and kick a ball around.

7. Build a tent. Whether it’s indoors or outdoors tents offer a small retreat from the outside world to play a game or read a book together.

8. Go for a walk. An after dinner walk is great for the whole family. It’s one last chance for the kids to burn off some energy and it’s a chance to just be together.

9. Movie night. Make some popcorn, grab some blankets and settle in for a fun movie.

10. Follow the leader. Not all of our children communicate and interact in the same way. Take a few minutes to just sit with your child and follow their lead. Lay on the floor with them, push a toy car around, enter their world for a few minutes. You never know where it will take you.